Friday, December 02, 2005
December Update from Bangalore
Here we are in January already. I'm abbreviating my recap of two highlights of the month of December--a three day yoga retreat and a two day trip to Bombay (Mumbai) with Badri--in the interest of getting this out before the dawn of the next new year. I hope you all had a calm and relaxing holidays and welcoming in of the new year--that's the most we can hope for on our end. But most of all, I hope this finds you all healthy and enjoying loved ones.
Thursday, December 1, 2005
Got together with my friend, Dolores, and we stopped at the Christmas Bazaar organized by CSB, Community Services of Bangalore, a non-profit charitable organization that raises funds for the local charitable organizations. I think we arrived a little late, so the best goodies were scooped up.
From there we decided to go to the Strand Bookstall's annual bookfair. In a word, "amazing". It's a good thing Dolores had to get to work by 4pm, because I could have been lost in there for hours (and spent a lot more money). Did a lot of Christmas and birthday shopping.
I don't think I mentioned another bookfair I went to a couple weeks ago where there were more local Indian authors and publishers. I did most of my Christmas shopping at both fairs.
The funniest thing was a t-shirt I saw on a guy in his 20s (I imagined him to be post-IIT [Indian Institute of Technology] or an IT [Information Technology] worker) at yesterday's fair: "Geek by nature, Linux by choice". Badri really appreciated it when I emailed it to him: "Linux" is a computer operating system he's into.
Friday, December 2, 2005
Maya stayed home sick from school yesterday with a sore throat and cough, and while this morning she seemed fine, I got a call from school at 11 saying she was sick. I picked her up with Molly and her temperature was 102.5. It came down soon after Motrin, but then went back up to 104 later in the day.
Saturday, December 3, 2005
My sister Mary's birthday. The two of us were less than 13 months apart. How in blazes did my mother do it? Of course, there's also my brother--he and I are less than 15 months apart (like Charlie and Molly), then there's a big gap between Mary and my other sister, Patty--15 months + 1 week.
Went to a meeting at the educational NGO, Akshara, to talk about their immense project to have all Bangalore public school children reading by June 2006. The meeting was led by Colonal Rajan, CEO of Akshara, and attended by other volunteers, including Sujatha, whose "blogpourri" site chronicles life in Bangalore.
Sunday, December 4, 2005
Saturday, December 10, 2005
Health meeting at school
Met with preschool people (parents and teachers) to discuss some health concerns at the school. Interesting to see what the issues are here versus in the U.S. There's some overlap, but some differences as well: how often should you de-worm your children (twice a year from two years old); how soon should your child return to school after a bout of fever (answer varies, but generally 48 hours after fever has subsided); what's the policy on a child returning to school after communicable diseases like chicken pox, mumps, measles, dysentery, typhoid, pink eye, etc (all varies); lice, fingernails (how long to keep them), ear wax. Lots of fun stuff.
In the afternoon went to Maya's classmate, Divya's, birthday party "The Embassy" by the Police Commissioner's Office. Another returned NRI (non-resident Indian) family.
Christmas Party at The Hotel Oberoi
There were some returned tickets due to illness, so we were able to make it to the Christmas party after all. Again, ran into a ton of "old" friends--mostly moms of Maya's old classmates from the Canadian school--Jo, from France; Theresa, who'd just had her baby four weeks before and hired my good friend, Nicola's, former nanny Selvie; Asja, from Germany; Claudia, from Peru.
Maya had a great time working on the craft tables, making snowflakes, angels, painting a pot, making cookies. Molly had a great time eating the cookies and painting a pot. And Charlie had a great time running around.
Holiday Party at the Mehta's
Went to a great Christmas Party at Nina and Sandeep's with Badri and Dolores. Met some very interesting people I hadn't met before--Olga, Alla, Alita and Nageen--and caught up with some friends I hadn't seen in a while. I wore one of the saris Badri had given me for my birthday. Rita did a nice job wrapping it, since I still haven't learned. The party was catered by Raaga, an Indiranagar restaurant not far from our house. Yummy! and an endless supply of the most drinkable Indian wine, Grover's La Reserva (a red).
Sunday, December 11, 2005
We were on our ritual stroller walk/loop that takes us by the Indiranagar Club, and as we were passing the neatly kept house across from the club where a very friendly woman lives, she happened to be outside and came up to greet me. She didn't have her usual warm smile, but instead greeted me with "My husband is no more". I gave her a big hug and she invited me inside. I looked over to Badri, who was then left with the two strollers. He gave me a nod. I took my shoes off outside, putting them alongside the eight other pairs.
As I walked in I saw the rectangular room was arranged with chairs along the perimeter, with the pooja altar (for lack of a better word) in the left corner. I told her, "Your husband was very handsome." They had a picture of him in younger years above the arrangement of offerings: fruit, flowers. One of the daughters-in-law told me she was to have come in February, but then her father-in-law passed away before she could come and see him for the last time. She told me they're on the tenth day of puja, and tomorrow is the painful day when the widow is supposed to remove her thali (wedding chain). The daughter-in-law told me the family has told her that she only need follow the rituals that she chooses to, and I get the feeling (and hope) that she decides to forego that one. The thaali, like the wedding ring is other cultures, is a symbol of a marriage bond between a man and a woman. The word thali (or thaali) originated from thala (the palmyra tree). When the custom of marriage started, a necklace made out of talipatra leaves was used as a token of marriage. When Badri and I got married, Amma had designed a beautiful thali that I was given in our ceremony. Traditionally, like the wedding ring, it is never removed, except after the husband dies.
Shreyas Retreat, December 14-17, 2005
Went to a yoga retreat called Shreyas, about an hour and a half from Bangalore. Very India--driving down rough and bumpy roads, we came to a gate with eight foot walls on either side. Then you enter an oasis. Beautiful reception area with rose petals floating in pools and one of my favorite touches--stone buddha heads surrounded by flowers, both resting on a large leaf.
The architecture, furniture, and vegetation reminds me a lot of Kerala--dark wood framed screen doors and coconut trees. Oddly enough, I was the only guest in the three days I was there. It's a 25 acre property we reached after heading in the direction of the Canadian School (Yelahanka) and the Pune Road. It is really quite a beautiful place, with Balinese sculptures of the Hindu gods Ram, Sita and Hanuman between the pool and yoga hall; and another of Krishna and Nandi between the dining room and front gate; aromatic trees and flowering plants (frangipani among them) all over, punctuated with fountains that are lit up at night.
There is an awesome pool, edgeless on one side so when you're swimming towards Ram and Sita you see only coconut trees beyond the water. The pool is ozonated, making the water crystal clear and leaving no red eyes for swimmers.
All the food is vegetarian, and lunch on Wednesday was a wonderful salad made of sprouts, fresh coriander, julienned tomatoes, onions, lettuce, cucumber and black pepper with a lemon dressing. That was followed by khadai paneer, which is an amazing blend of tomato and capsicum (green bell peppers) in a thick masala sauce with paneer (cottage cheese cubes). The aloo (potato) mehti and toor dal (lentils) were lovely accompaniments--I'm really keen on having fresh coriander in my dal these days.
Thursday's lunch salad was a yummy combo of cucumbers, cherry tomatoes, capsicum, lettuce, and avocado, with a delicious dressing of black pepper, oil and vinegar, garlic, honey, and fresh dill. There was a fettucini with tomato sauce, but the most interesting was the baked potato stuffed with what appeared to be a hollandaise sauce, but was in fact a pureed baby corn and butter sauce (mmmmmm!!!).
There are a few libraries with a generous selection of fiction and non-fiction. After breakfast on Thursday I read Holy Cow, non-fiction describing aspects of India--the sacred cow, significance of the bindi, the Mahabharata and Ramayana, etc. Then went for a swim, relaxed in the jacuzzi, back into the pool, then into the steam room.
My room is a stand-alone "tent", actually stucco walls with a canvas roof. The bathroom is sublime--there are three walls, the tent for a roof, and where the fourth wall would be is open--there are three side-by-side panels of blinds that can be up or down and outside is a rock garden with a frangipani tree, banana tree, and a square pool with spirals of gold and burgundy flowers. As I looked in the pool there was what I thought was a small frog statue put there for effect. As I reached down the frog popped under the surface. My tent is called "Pragnya", which is sanskrit for "wisdom".
Quite a change to have different yoga instructors after having the same instructor for the most part over a year and a half, three days a week. I had two private classes with Rucha, and then a lovely breathing meditation session in the meditation hut. The hut is in the corner of the Shreyas farm, where vegetables and herbs are organically grown. The setting is heaven on earth. It's actually less of a hut than a roughly hewn platform with a thatch roof and rattan blinds. The blinds gently move with the breeze. The two pillars that support the roof are beautiful old relics from Kerala. There's an off-white padded cushion that nearly covers the floor, and beautifully stitched, very colorful pillows from Gujarat which I leaned against as Rucha guided me through slowed down breathing, then relaxation, then visualization. Rucha describes the visualization process very well. For example, she says, visualize something in nature, like a mountain that withstands storms and earthquakes; or like water, which takes the shape of the vessel it fills, adapting as needed.
All the retreat's grounds are peaceful. As I sat by the pool having a morning coffee, the soft breeze, clean air, and quiet punctuated only by birdsong brought me back to springtime in Maine as a child. This retreat really brings me back to quiet and peaceful times in the woods. With it comes a bit of melancholy, knowing surely that those woods have been cleared for houses.
On Thursday I had a heavenly 1 1/4 hour scrub and massage by Reshma (one complimentary massage with the stay). She's 30 years old and has been giving massages since she was 15 years old, having been trained by her aunt. She's from Koramangala but now she, her husband, and three year old daughter Iman live out this way. She had the best touch and hands of any massage therapist I'd seen in India. I washed off the scrub under the amazing outdoor shower, warm water pouring from the wooden spigots.
Friday's lunch featured a delicious burnt corn salad with diced green, yellow, and red capsicum and red onion, along with pan fried corn and a vinaigrette with fresh parsley. The paneer (cottage cheese cubes) skewers with salsa were terrific. The salsa was fantastic--straight out of Mexico. The paneer was alternated on the skewers with red onion, green and yellow capsicum, and zucchini, all marinated in olive oil and tomato sauce.
There's a movie viewing room with a large screen where you can watch one complimentary movie a day. There are hundreds of moview to choose from and very comfortable leather couches and reclining easy chairs to sit in. On Wednesday night I watched "In Good Company", a Dennis Quaid and Scarlett Johanssen movie about an ad exec whose new boss (half his age) falls in love with his daughter. Fun, light movie.
On Thursday I watched "Sideways", an entertaining flick about two buddies getting away to California's wine country for a week.
While at Shreyas, I played cricket for the first time in my life. Rucha used to play for the state of Karnataka, so showed me how to put on the pads and gloves, how to hold the bat, and then how to hit. We were inside the batting net, one guy on the machine, one behind the wickets (which I let fall quite a few times), and one up with Rucha and the bowler to help out. I think the guys had fun seeing a foreigner have a whack at it.
As Rucha pointed out, field hockey is the national sport, not cricket, although Indians are much more wild over the latter. Her whole family is cricket crazy, and when there's a big world match, their whole life stops except for watching the match.
A great getaway. But I must say I missed Badri and the kids. I'll never forget arriving back home on Saturday. Rita, the nanny, was standing at the gate with a very tired looking Charlie in her arms. I was struck by how "chubby" and changed his face seemed after only three days away from him.
Monday, December 19, 2005
I went to the girls' school today to sing Christmas carols with all three classes. When I walked into Molly's class she was sitting on a chair in a circle with her classmates, looking very unhappy. I wondered if she'd acted up and been reprimanded, but it turned out that she was just feeling terrible. I led her over to lay down while I sang with the class, and just as I was finishing up, she started throwing up, poor thing. She just had this two weeks ago! Everyone says it's the viral thing going around. Enough already!
Was up most of the night with Molly. She slept with me and got up from time to time to get sick.
Tuesday, December 20, 2005
Charlie's turn to stay up all night with mommy. He threw up about five times in four hours. I lost track of how many times I changed the sheets and his pjs, poor thing. Molly is back on her feet, but I still kept her home from school. She asked to hold on to the cooking pot nonetheless throughout the day in case she felt it coming on.
Wednesday, December 21, 2005
Kept Molly home from school. By the end of the day when Badri got home from his four day business trip, I was sick. Went to bed early and stayed in bed most of the next day. Just knocked out.
Friday, December 23, 2005
Went to school to sing Christmas carols and read The Grinch Who Stole Christmas with Maya's class. They really enjoyed it. Even the children who aren't Christian seemed to have an idea about what was going on. In fact, one of the big Hindu temples here in India celebrated Christmas and had hundreds, if not thousands, attend. There's definitely a lot of crossover among the religions, with Hindus celebrating, at some level, Christian holidays, and vice versa.
Brush with fame
Well, it looks like Evo Morales may become Bolivia's next president. Who's he? He's the coca union leader who brought me to tears back in 1991 when I was visiting the farmers union to try and find a guide to lead me out through the Chapare. You see, the Chapare is one of the coca growing regions in Bolivia, and I'd decided I wanted to do my graduate school field studies out in Santisima Trinidad, part of the Isiboro Secure National Park. I met another union leader, Nestor Bravo, who had offered to be my guide, and I had to meet him at their offices. I ran into Morales before Bravo arrived that day, and he gave me hell--accusing me of being with the U.S. Drug Enforcement Agency. I suppose I can't really blame him, what with the U.S. sticking its nose into Bolivia's affairs, and trying to wipe out its coca crop. Coca, by the way, isn't only used to get to cocaine--it's also an indigenous crop that's been part of their culture for hundreds of years and has lots of legal uses: it helps reduce hunger, effects of altitude and fatigue, etc. Morales is one of the growing number of leftist leaders in South America. Chile recently elected their first woman president, a survivor of Pinochet's policies. What leader did Morales first visit after being elected? Fidel Castro.
Here's a link to an article about Morales' inauguration:
http://www.mercurynews.com/mld/mercurynews/news/world/13687722.html
Saturday, December 24, 2005
Went to the Royal Orchid hotel to see what Christmas decorations were up. They had a great big Santa and his sleigh in the lobby. The kids were happy to run around on the large hilly lawn, a rarity in Bangalore.
Sunday, December 25, 2005
Christmas Day. Kids slept until nearly 7. Maya was thrilled with her pink remote control car and ready made sari, Molly was thrilled with the tricycle Charlie got, and Charlie loved the little tent with balls that Molly got. Very low key day. Got a taxi and drove down MG Road and Brigade Road to see what was going on. Had dinner at a restaurant where a pretty scary looking Santa (if I were I kid, I wouldn't have trusted him--rubber Santa mask and surgical gloves) but Molly and Maya had a great time dancing with him (Charlie couldn't warm up to him).
Monday, December 26
Very exciting and momentous day. Maya lost her first tooth. Front and bottom center.
Thursday, December 29, 2005
Badri and I took a two day trip to Mumbai (formerly Bombay) and had a terrific time. Although much larger than Bangalore, the city has really maintained a lot of its charm--beautiful architecture and cobblestone streets down by India Gate and the Taj Mahal hotel. Of course, the air quality is even worse than in Bangalore, and the slums are more extensive. There is a gaping divide between the rich and poor in both cities, as in many American cities.
We stayed at the ITC Sheraton while we were there, which was nice, but if we had the chance to go again (which we probably won't this time around in India), we'd stay somewhere closer to Colaba. This is the very hip/cool area in the south of Mumbai--I'd even go as far to say an Indian Greenwich Village on an even grander scale. We landed in Mumbai at 2:30 pm, dropped our luggage at the hotel and took an old non-a/c Fiat taxi to Colaba, which we had heard was the place to be. We walked down to the Gateway of India, 26 meters tall. It was built to commemorate the visit of King George V in 1911, and officially opened in 1924. It faces out to the Mumbai Harbor. A very happening place, with Indian and foreign tourists having a grand old time walking around, feeding pigeons, buying snacks and balloons for children. Right across from the Gateway of India is the Taj Mahal Hotel, built in 1903 by Parsi industrialist JN Tata.
I was struck by the grandness of the Prince of Wales Museum (originally called Chhatrapati Shivaji Maharaj Vastu Sangrahalaya). It was built to commemorate King George V's first visit to India in 1905. Very beautiful and ornate. Also impressive is the Gothic style Victoria Terminus--which looks more like a cathedral than a train station with its carvings of gargoyles, peacocks, and elephants, along with flying buttresses, domes, turrets, and stained glass windows.
We went to the Jehangir Gallery, which faces the Prince of Wales Museum. It shows both established and upcoming artists and is the "uncrowned Mecca of art in Mumbai". There was an artist from Bangladesh in one gallery exclusively showing his works (we met him there), and the other gallery featured Bengali artists. I was amazed at how many familes with children of all ages were there enjoying the art. We walked in at around 6:30pm, there was no admission charge, and waiters were serving soda and wine.
I will really miss India--the smells of incense, the sights of paan (betel leaf) and peanut wallas (sellers) on the sidewalk. We walked into Sachin Tendulkar's restaurant just to see what it was like (one of India's most famous cricket players). Spent some time at Leopold's, a cool cafe restaurant where we relaxed for a bit and had some prawns and french fries.
Met Badri's brother, Ravi, in his neighborhood at Goa Portuguesa in Mahim, a suburb of Mumbai. Had some delicious Goan food with lots of coconut and chilis. The owner is a doctor who saw the need for this kind of restaurant specializing in Goan and Keralan fare. He's a very friendly fellow, stopping by our table to chat, sporting a diamond encrusted "om" pendant (om is a mystic word or mantra, often found at the beginning of prayers and mantras) and a pistol at his hip.
We met Ravi and their cousin, Karthik, and Karthik's wife Damini at Gallops, a restaurant at the racecoursethe following day. I hadn't seen Karthik since I first visited Delhi in 1998, and had never met Damini, who is really nice, down to earth. Really wish we had more time to spend with them.
Did a little bit of shopping, actually more than we'd originally planned on. Badri bought a nice trumpet from a street vendor and hopes to take lessons soon (later turns out, Maya can really blow the horn! maybe they'll both take lessons), and bought an outfit for Maya, Molly and me in a cute little shop in Colaba. Bought some camembert cheese in a nice bakery/wine bar/restaurant, had some great sushi at Wasabi, a restaurant in the Taj hotel.
Packed in a lot from Thursday 'til Saturday. But realized in the days after I got home that I probably wouldn't take a night away from the kids for a while (dare I say a year or something along those lines) because Charlie's sleep really seemed thrown off. No longer happy to go down for naps without a LOT of reading and rocking.
Saturday, December 31, 2005
We came back to Bangalore in the early afternoon, and took a drive up Mahatma Gandhi (MG) Road to see how people were preparing for the New Years' Eve festivities. Other than that, had a very quiet evening trying to recollect what we had done on other December 31sts in the last ten years--a few of note: in 1996, only recently having arrived in San Diego, we set the alarm clock for 11:55, then woke up to watch the ball drop in Times Square (NY) then dance for a few minutes, then back to bed; in 1997, met up with some fellow travelers in Antigua, Guatemala at a great bar called Frieda's; in 1998, I believe we were in India, possibly up in Rajasthan; 1999 (or 2000?) at Frederique and Ed's in San Diego; in 2001, we celebrated Maya's first new years with us; in 2002, Molly's first; and in 2003, awaited Charlie's arrival (he came 6 days into the new year).
Sari given to me by Badri for Diwali
The best we could do for Christmas photo this year
Maya doing Christmas crafts at party
Streetside temple in Assam
Charlie and his bubbles
Maya in sari on Christmas morning
Molly in new bathing suit with anklets
Badri and Maya in new outfits
"Om" symbol is sideways, in pink, on righthand side
Maya missing her first tooth!
Here we are in January already. I'm abbreviating my recap of two highlights of the month of December--a three day yoga retreat and a two day trip to Bombay (Mumbai) with Badri--in the interest of getting this out before the dawn of the next new year. I hope you all had a calm and relaxing holidays and welcoming in of the new year--that's the most we can hope for on our end. But most of all, I hope this finds you all healthy and enjoying loved ones.
Thursday, December 1, 2005
Got together with my friend, Dolores, and we stopped at the Christmas Bazaar organized by CSB, Community Services of Bangalore, a non-profit charitable organization that raises funds for the local charitable organizations. I think we arrived a little late, so the best goodies were scooped up.
From there we decided to go to the Strand Bookstall's annual bookfair. In a word, "amazing". It's a good thing Dolores had to get to work by 4pm, because I could have been lost in there for hours (and spent a lot more money). Did a lot of Christmas and birthday shopping.
I don't think I mentioned another bookfair I went to a couple weeks ago where there were more local Indian authors and publishers. I did most of my Christmas shopping at both fairs.
The funniest thing was a t-shirt I saw on a guy in his 20s (I imagined him to be post-IIT [Indian Institute of Technology] or an IT [Information Technology] worker) at yesterday's fair: "Geek by nature, Linux by choice". Badri really appreciated it when I emailed it to him: "Linux" is a computer operating system he's into.
Friday, December 2, 2005
Maya stayed home sick from school yesterday with a sore throat and cough, and while this morning she seemed fine, I got a call from school at 11 saying she was sick. I picked her up with Molly and her temperature was 102.5. It came down soon after Motrin, but then went back up to 104 later in the day.
Saturday, December 3, 2005
My sister Mary's birthday. The two of us were less than 13 months apart. How in blazes did my mother do it? Of course, there's also my brother--he and I are less than 15 months apart (like Charlie and Molly), then there's a big gap between Mary and my other sister, Patty--15 months + 1 week.
Went to a meeting at the educational NGO, Akshara, to talk about their immense project to have all Bangalore public school children reading by June 2006. The meeting was led by Colonal Rajan, CEO of Akshara, and attended by other volunteers, including Sujatha, whose "blogpourri" site chronicles life in Bangalore.
Sunday, December 4, 2005
Christmas in
We set up the Christmas tree today. It's an artificial tree we bought in
I can't believe I let the deadline for buying Christmas party tickets slip by. This year's OWC Christmas party for children is being held this weekend, the 10th, at the Oberoi Hotel. I called to see if I could buy tickets, and lo and behold, they were all sold out!* Good thing I didn't tell Maya we'd be going in advance. We won't be short of fun activities for the weekend though: she'll go to a birthday party Saturday morning, and then to a friend's house in the afternoon to help put up and decorate their tree, as well as make Christmas cookies and ornaments (another American/Indian family--wife from
*Called an OWC member the day before the Christmas party to find that one family wasn't going to the party due to illness, so we scooped up their tickets.
Saturday, December 10, 2005
Health meeting at school
Met with preschool people (parents and teachers) to discuss some health concerns at the school. Interesting to see what the issues are here versus in the U.S. There's some overlap, but some differences as well: how often should you de-worm your children (twice a year from two years old); how soon should your child return to school after a bout of fever (answer varies, but generally 48 hours after fever has subsided); what's the policy on a child returning to school after communicable diseases like chicken pox, mumps, measles, dysentery, typhoid, pink eye, etc (all varies); lice, fingernails (how long to keep them), ear wax. Lots of fun stuff.
In the afternoon went to Maya's classmate, Divya's, birthday party "The Embassy" by the Police Commissioner's Office. Another returned NRI (non-resident Indian) family.
Christmas Party at The Hotel Oberoi
There were some returned tickets due to illness, so we were able to make it to the Christmas party after all. Again, ran into a ton of "old" friends--mostly moms of Maya's old classmates from the Canadian school--Jo, from France; Theresa, who'd just had her baby four weeks before and hired my good friend, Nicola's, former nanny Selvie; Asja, from Germany; Claudia, from Peru.
Maya had a great time working on the craft tables, making snowflakes, angels, painting a pot, making cookies. Molly had a great time eating the cookies and painting a pot. And Charlie had a great time running around.
****************
Holiday Party at the Mehta's
Went to a great Christmas Party at Nina and Sandeep's with Badri and Dolores. Met some very interesting people I hadn't met before--Olga, Alla, Alita and Nageen--and caught up with some friends I hadn't seen in a while. I wore one of the saris Badri had given me for my birthday. Rita did a nice job wrapping it, since I still haven't learned. The party was catered by Raaga, an Indiranagar restaurant not far from our house. Yummy! and an endless supply of the most drinkable Indian wine, Grover's La Reserva (a red).
Sunday, December 11, 2005
We were on our ritual stroller walk/loop that takes us by the Indiranagar Club, and as we were passing the neatly kept house across from the club where a very friendly woman lives, she happened to be outside and came up to greet me. She didn't have her usual warm smile, but instead greeted me with "My husband is no more". I gave her a big hug and she invited me inside. I looked over to Badri, who was then left with the two strollers. He gave me a nod. I took my shoes off outside, putting them alongside the eight other pairs.
As I walked in I saw the rectangular room was arranged with chairs along the perimeter, with the pooja altar (for lack of a better word) in the left corner. I told her, "Your husband was very handsome." They had a picture of him in younger years above the arrangement of offerings: fruit, flowers. One of the daughters-in-law told me she was to have come in February, but then her father-in-law passed away before she could come and see him for the last time. She told me they're on the tenth day of puja, and tomorrow is the painful day when the widow is supposed to remove her thali (wedding chain). The daughter-in-law told me the family has told her that she only need follow the rituals that she chooses to, and I get the feeling (and hope) that she decides to forego that one. The thaali, like the wedding ring is other cultures, is a symbol of a marriage bond between a man and a woman. The word thali (or thaali) originated from thala (the palmyra tree). When the custom of marriage started, a necklace made out of talipatra leaves was used as a token of marriage. When Badri and I got married, Amma had designed a beautiful thali that I was given in our ceremony. Traditionally, like the wedding ring, it is never removed, except after the husband dies.
Shreyas Retreat, December 14-17, 2005
Went to a yoga retreat called Shreyas, about an hour and a half from Bangalore. Very India--driving down rough and bumpy roads, we came to a gate with eight foot walls on either side. Then you enter an oasis. Beautiful reception area with rose petals floating in pools and one of my favorite touches--stone buddha heads surrounded by flowers, both resting on a large leaf.
The architecture, furniture, and vegetation reminds me a lot of Kerala--dark wood framed screen doors and coconut trees. Oddly enough, I was the only guest in the three days I was there. It's a 25 acre property we reached after heading in the direction of the Canadian School (Yelahanka) and the Pune Road. It is really quite a beautiful place, with Balinese sculptures of the Hindu gods Ram, Sita and Hanuman between the pool and yoga hall; and another of Krishna and Nandi between the dining room and front gate; aromatic trees and flowering plants (frangipani among them) all over, punctuated with fountains that are lit up at night.
There is an awesome pool, edgeless on one side so when you're swimming towards Ram and Sita you see only coconut trees beyond the water. The pool is ozonated, making the water crystal clear and leaving no red eyes for swimmers.
All the food is vegetarian, and lunch on Wednesday was a wonderful salad made of sprouts, fresh coriander, julienned tomatoes, onions, lettuce, cucumber and black pepper with a lemon dressing. That was followed by khadai paneer, which is an amazing blend of tomato and capsicum (green bell peppers) in a thick masala sauce with paneer (cottage cheese cubes). The aloo (potato) mehti and toor dal (lentils) were lovely accompaniments--I'm really keen on having fresh coriander in my dal these days.
Thursday's lunch salad was a yummy combo of cucumbers, cherry tomatoes, capsicum, lettuce, and avocado, with a delicious dressing of black pepper, oil and vinegar, garlic, honey, and fresh dill. There was a fettucini with tomato sauce, but the most interesting was the baked potato stuffed with what appeared to be a hollandaise sauce, but was in fact a pureed baby corn and butter sauce (mmmmmm!!!).
There are a few libraries with a generous selection of fiction and non-fiction. After breakfast on Thursday I read Holy Cow, non-fiction describing aspects of India--the sacred cow, significance of the bindi, the Mahabharata and Ramayana, etc. Then went for a swim, relaxed in the jacuzzi, back into the pool, then into the steam room.
My room is a stand-alone "tent", actually stucco walls with a canvas roof. The bathroom is sublime--there are three walls, the tent for a roof, and where the fourth wall would be is open--there are three side-by-side panels of blinds that can be up or down and outside is a rock garden with a frangipani tree, banana tree, and a square pool with spirals of gold and burgundy flowers. As I looked in the pool there was what I thought was a small frog statue put there for effect. As I reached down the frog popped under the surface. My tent is called "Pragnya", which is sanskrit for "wisdom".
Quite a change to have different yoga instructors after having the same instructor for the most part over a year and a half, three days a week. I had two private classes with Rucha, and then a lovely breathing meditation session in the meditation hut. The hut is in the corner of the Shreyas farm, where vegetables and herbs are organically grown. The setting is heaven on earth. It's actually less of a hut than a roughly hewn platform with a thatch roof and rattan blinds. The blinds gently move with the breeze. The two pillars that support the roof are beautiful old relics from Kerala. There's an off-white padded cushion that nearly covers the floor, and beautifully stitched, very colorful pillows from Gujarat which I leaned against as Rucha guided me through slowed down breathing, then relaxation, then visualization. Rucha describes the visualization process very well. For example, she says, visualize something in nature, like a mountain that withstands storms and earthquakes; or like water, which takes the shape of the vessel it fills, adapting as needed.
All the retreat's grounds are peaceful. As I sat by the pool having a morning coffee, the soft breeze, clean air, and quiet punctuated only by birdsong brought me back to springtime in Maine as a child. This retreat really brings me back to quiet and peaceful times in the woods. With it comes a bit of melancholy, knowing surely that those woods have been cleared for houses.
On Thursday I had a heavenly 1 1/4 hour scrub and massage by Reshma (one complimentary massage with the stay). She's 30 years old and has been giving massages since she was 15 years old, having been trained by her aunt. She's from Koramangala but now she, her husband, and three year old daughter Iman live out this way. She had the best touch and hands of any massage therapist I'd seen in India. I washed off the scrub under the amazing outdoor shower, warm water pouring from the wooden spigots.
Friday's lunch featured a delicious burnt corn salad with diced green, yellow, and red capsicum and red onion, along with pan fried corn and a vinaigrette with fresh parsley. The paneer (cottage cheese cubes) skewers with salsa were terrific. The salsa was fantastic--straight out of Mexico. The paneer was alternated on the skewers with red onion, green and yellow capsicum, and zucchini, all marinated in olive oil and tomato sauce.
There's a movie viewing room with a large screen where you can watch one complimentary movie a day. There are hundreds of moview to choose from and very comfortable leather couches and reclining easy chairs to sit in. On Wednesday night I watched "In Good Company", a Dennis Quaid and Scarlett Johanssen movie about an ad exec whose new boss (half his age) falls in love with his daughter. Fun, light movie.
On Thursday I watched "Sideways", an entertaining flick about two buddies getting away to California's wine country for a week.
While at Shreyas, I played cricket for the first time in my life. Rucha used to play for the state of Karnataka, so showed me how to put on the pads and gloves, how to hold the bat, and then how to hit. We were inside the batting net, one guy on the machine, one behind the wickets (which I let fall quite a few times), and one up with Rucha and the bowler to help out. I think the guys had fun seeing a foreigner have a whack at it.
As Rucha pointed out, field hockey is the national sport, not cricket, although Indians are much more wild over the latter. Her whole family is cricket crazy, and when there's a big world match, their whole life stops except for watching the match.
A great getaway. But I must say I missed Badri and the kids. I'll never forget arriving back home on Saturday. Rita, the nanny, was standing at the gate with a very tired looking Charlie in her arms. I was struck by how "chubby" and changed his face seemed after only three days away from him.
Monday, December 19, 2005
I went to the girls' school today to sing Christmas carols with all three classes. When I walked into Molly's class she was sitting on a chair in a circle with her classmates, looking very unhappy. I wondered if she'd acted up and been reprimanded, but it turned out that she was just feeling terrible. I led her over to lay down while I sang with the class, and just as I was finishing up, she started throwing up, poor thing. She just had this two weeks ago! Everyone says it's the viral thing going around. Enough already!
Was up most of the night with Molly. She slept with me and got up from time to time to get sick.
Tuesday, December 20, 2005
Charlie's turn to stay up all night with mommy. He threw up about five times in four hours. I lost track of how many times I changed the sheets and his pjs, poor thing. Molly is back on her feet, but I still kept her home from school. She asked to hold on to the cooking pot nonetheless throughout the day in case she felt it coming on.
Wednesday, December 21, 2005
Kept Molly home from school. By the end of the day when Badri got home from his four day business trip, I was sick. Went to bed early and stayed in bed most of the next day. Just knocked out.
Friday, December 23, 2005
Went to school to sing Christmas carols and read The Grinch Who Stole Christmas with Maya's class. They really enjoyed it. Even the children who aren't Christian seemed to have an idea about what was going on. In fact, one of the big Hindu temples here in India celebrated Christmas and had hundreds, if not thousands, attend. There's definitely a lot of crossover among the religions, with Hindus celebrating, at some level, Christian holidays, and vice versa.
Brush with fame
Well, it looks like Evo Morales may become Bolivia's next president. Who's he? He's the coca union leader who brought me to tears back in 1991 when I was visiting the farmers union to try and find a guide to lead me out through the Chapare. You see, the Chapare is one of the coca growing regions in Bolivia, and I'd decided I wanted to do my graduate school field studies out in Santisima Trinidad, part of the Isiboro Secure National Park. I met another union leader, Nestor Bravo, who had offered to be my guide, and I had to meet him at their offices. I ran into Morales before Bravo arrived that day, and he gave me hell--accusing me of being with the U.S. Drug Enforcement Agency. I suppose I can't really blame him, what with the U.S. sticking its nose into Bolivia's affairs, and trying to wipe out its coca crop. Coca, by the way, isn't only used to get to cocaine--it's also an indigenous crop that's been part of their culture for hundreds of years and has lots of legal uses: it helps reduce hunger, effects of altitude and fatigue, etc. Morales is one of the growing number of leftist leaders in South America. Chile recently elected their first woman president, a survivor of Pinochet's policies. What leader did Morales first visit after being elected? Fidel Castro.
Here's a link to an article about Morales' inauguration:
http://www.mercurynews.com/mld/mercurynews/news/world/13687722.html
Saturday, December 24, 2005
Went to the Royal Orchid hotel to see what Christmas decorations were up. They had a great big Santa and his sleigh in the lobby. The kids were happy to run around on the large hilly lawn, a rarity in Bangalore.
Sunday, December 25, 2005
Christmas Day. Kids slept until nearly 7. Maya was thrilled with her pink remote control car and ready made sari, Molly was thrilled with the tricycle Charlie got, and Charlie loved the little tent with balls that Molly got. Very low key day. Got a taxi and drove down MG Road and Brigade Road to see what was going on. Had dinner at a restaurant where a pretty scary looking Santa (if I were I kid, I wouldn't have trusted him--rubber Santa mask and surgical gloves) but Molly and Maya had a great time dancing with him (Charlie couldn't warm up to him).
Monday, December 26
Very exciting and momentous day. Maya lost her first tooth. Front and bottom center.
Thursday, December 29, 2005
Badri and I took a two day trip to Mumbai (formerly Bombay) and had a terrific time. Although much larger than Bangalore, the city has really maintained a lot of its charm--beautiful architecture and cobblestone streets down by India Gate and the Taj Mahal hotel. Of course, the air quality is even worse than in Bangalore, and the slums are more extensive. There is a gaping divide between the rich and poor in both cities, as in many American cities.
We stayed at the ITC Sheraton while we were there, which was nice, but if we had the chance to go again (which we probably won't this time around in India), we'd stay somewhere closer to Colaba. This is the very hip/cool area in the south of Mumbai--I'd even go as far to say an Indian Greenwich Village on an even grander scale. We landed in Mumbai at 2:30 pm, dropped our luggage at the hotel and took an old non-a/c Fiat taxi to Colaba, which we had heard was the place to be. We walked down to the Gateway of India, 26 meters tall. It was built to commemorate the visit of King George V in 1911, and officially opened in 1924. It faces out to the Mumbai Harbor. A very happening place, with Indian and foreign tourists having a grand old time walking around, feeding pigeons, buying snacks and balloons for children. Right across from the Gateway of India is the Taj Mahal Hotel, built in 1903 by Parsi industrialist JN Tata.
I was struck by the grandness of the Prince of Wales Museum (originally called Chhatrapati Shivaji Maharaj Vastu Sangrahalaya). It was built to commemorate King George V's first visit to India in 1905. Very beautiful and ornate. Also impressive is the Gothic style Victoria Terminus--which looks more like a cathedral than a train station with its carvings of gargoyles, peacocks, and elephants, along with flying buttresses, domes, turrets, and stained glass windows.
We went to the Jehangir Gallery, which faces the Prince of Wales Museum. It shows both established and upcoming artists and is the "uncrowned Mecca of art in Mumbai". There was an artist from Bangladesh in one gallery exclusively showing his works (we met him there), and the other gallery featured Bengali artists. I was amazed at how many familes with children of all ages were there enjoying the art. We walked in at around 6:30pm, there was no admission charge, and waiters were serving soda and wine.
I will really miss India--the smells of incense, the sights of paan (betel leaf) and peanut wallas (sellers) on the sidewalk. We walked into Sachin Tendulkar's restaurant just to see what it was like (one of India's most famous cricket players). Spent some time at Leopold's, a cool cafe restaurant where we relaxed for a bit and had some prawns and french fries.
Met Badri's brother, Ravi, in his neighborhood at Goa Portuguesa in Mahim, a suburb of Mumbai. Had some delicious Goan food with lots of coconut and chilis. The owner is a doctor who saw the need for this kind of restaurant specializing in Goan and Keralan fare. He's a very friendly fellow, stopping by our table to chat, sporting a diamond encrusted "om" pendant (om is a mystic word or mantra, often found at the beginning of prayers and mantras) and a pistol at his hip.
We met Ravi and their cousin, Karthik, and Karthik's wife Damini at Gallops, a restaurant at the racecoursethe following day. I hadn't seen Karthik since I first visited Delhi in 1998, and had never met Damini, who is really nice, down to earth. Really wish we had more time to spend with them.
Did a little bit of shopping, actually more than we'd originally planned on. Badri bought a nice trumpet from a street vendor and hopes to take lessons soon (later turns out, Maya can really blow the horn! maybe they'll both take lessons), and bought an outfit for Maya, Molly and me in a cute little shop in Colaba. Bought some camembert cheese in a nice bakery/wine bar/restaurant, had some great sushi at Wasabi, a restaurant in the Taj hotel.
Packed in a lot from Thursday 'til Saturday. But realized in the days after I got home that I probably wouldn't take a night away from the kids for a while (dare I say a year or something along those lines) because Charlie's sleep really seemed thrown off. No longer happy to go down for naps without a LOT of reading and rocking.
Saturday, December 31, 2005
We came back to Bangalore in the early afternoon, and took a drive up Mahatma Gandhi (MG) Road to see how people were preparing for the New Years' Eve festivities. Other than that, had a very quiet evening trying to recollect what we had done on other December 31sts in the last ten years--a few of note: in 1996, only recently having arrived in San Diego, we set the alarm clock for 11:55, then woke up to watch the ball drop in Times Square (NY) then dance for a few minutes, then back to bed; in 1997, met up with some fellow travelers in Antigua, Guatemala at a great bar called Frieda's; in 1998, I believe we were in India, possibly up in Rajasthan; 1999 (or 2000?) at Frederique and Ed's in San Diego; in 2001, we celebrated Maya's first new years with us; in 2002, Molly's first; and in 2003, awaited Charlie's arrival (he came 6 days into the new year).
Sari given to me by Badri for Diwali
The best we could do for Christmas photo this year
Maya doing Christmas crafts at party
Streetside temple in Assam
Charlie and his bubbles
Maya in sari on Christmas morning
Molly in new bathing suit with anklets
Badri and Maya in new outfits
"Om" symbol is sideways, in pink, on righthand side
Maya missing her first tooth!
# posted by Kelly @ 4:03 PM 
