Tuesday, February 03, 2009
February 2009 Update from Bangalore
Budgeting and Predicting the Unknown
This month Badri and I sat down to estimate our expenses for the next year. Some things are clear cut, but others not. For instance, will we have to pay the expat, corporate rate of approximately $13,000, (equivalent of 6.5 lakh for Maya's school year at Mallya Aditi International School (MAIS)? or the local rate of 1.1 lakh (roughly $2,200)? We've been assured a "local" seat for Charlie at the lower rate, and are still waiting for an official letter for Molly's acceptance to the same school (we missed her application date a couple years ago because we thought we would be leaving India at that time).
Also up in the air is the question of what to do with all our furniture stored in one of Allied's California facilities. Oddly enough, when I priced out the cost of shipping everything to Boston or Bangalore, it turned out to be the same!! A little over $3000. We thought--oh, we'll ship it over here--before someone told me we'd have to pay duty on it at this point. When you enter India, you have to ship over all your things within the first year. If it comes later than that, you pay duty on the value.
So, given the unknowns, we figure we can survive in start-up mode (i.e., no income) for one to two years. It's great to see Badri so excited about his work now. The contacts he's been making through TiE--The Indus Entrepreneurs--have been invaluable. TiE is a non-profit global network of professionals and entrepreneurs established to foster entrepreneurship and nurture entrepreneurs.
As far as my consulting with Aperian Global, the economy's downturn has meant a lot less work coming in. So much so that only full-time employees will be getting the training assignments for the first quarter of 2009. As a consultant, that means I won't be in the training room through at least the end of March.
Sunday, February 1, 2009
Went to Innovative Film City about an hour and a half out of Bangalore to celebrate Nico's 5th birthday. Nico is one of Charlie's best friends, and we often talk about meeting up with them in Australia at some point after they live Bangalore in June. Our families have grown very close over the last three years. Kirsty and I actually met by email before they moved here, when she was pregnant with their youngest, Chloe. They came for her husband's job with Honeywell.
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
I discovered another perfectly acceptable way of economizing--not going out to lunch. Most Tuesdays Marylouise has physiotherapy in Indiranagar, quite far from her house, and stops over here before or after for lunch. With the economic downturn, lots of people are willing to forego some lunches out.
On the other hand, got together with Priya in the evening at a local jazz lounge bar, Take 5. It's close enough for both of us to walk to. It had been ages since we got together and caught up. Basically it works like this: one of us is feeling antsy at home, Badri and Kush are home and the kids are in bed, and we plan to meet and talk through everything. I will really miss her when they return to Chicago in April.
Wed., Feb. 4, 2009
Today's Mom's birthday.
Also, Maya's first day of swim lessons through school. Aditi doesn't have a pool on campus, but each class goes to Ramanashree California Resorts one day a week. Today she complained that the pool was too cold, but by March she'll be very happy, since it really heats up here in Bangalore in that month.
Friday, February 5, 2009
Had Sarayu Srinivasan over for dinner. We met a couple years ago when she'd first come to India with Intel and was moving into an apartment across from the Defence Colony children's park. We really fell out of touch, but then ran into each other a couple times at Democrats Abroad events. Her parents were born in India, and she in the U.S.
She had a great time with the kids, instructing them to call her Queen Sarayu and asking them to make a list of prospective husbands for her.
Friday, February 6, 2009
Badri and I went to see Slumdog Millionaire tonight. I thoroughly enjoyed it, and Badri thought it was fine. Actually, I think he was underwhelmed. Tough to please that guy with movies.
Saturday, February 7, 2009
We still enjoy the Children's Park in Defence Colony every once in a while, especially on Sat. morning. Often our Sat. and Sun. schedule goes like this: 1. park; 2. dosa at home; 3. The Park for swimming.
Saturday, February 7, 2009 A Dog Who Does Namaste at Clover Fields in Tamil Nadu
Visited our landlords Indira and Bala out at their place in Clover Fields. It was about an hour drive from our place, and is technically in Tamil Nadu! See, here in Bangalore we're in the state of Karnataka, and Tamil Nadu, the capital of which is Chennai, is the state to the southeast of us. Each house's lot is one acre and there are 200 acres total, with 17 acres set aside for the clubhouse.
This morning at breakfast Molly said that when she grows up she wants to be Bala's second wife because he's such a good cook. He makes his own pizza (with herbs from their garden), and that was Saturday night's treat, along with homemade brownies and a fresh fruit tart. Before dinner the kids went for a swim in the 25 meter pool and we watched a gorgeous sunset on the walk back to their place.
Bala and Indira have a ten year old black lab, Thunder, who is a sweetheart. His best friend is Roxy, a yellow lab who can stand up on her hind legs and do "namaste" with her front paws together. Roxy's owners split their time between India and New Jersey--their teenage twin boys weren't able to adjust to school/life here, so Mr. Roxy lives and works here, and Mrs. Roxy and sons divides their time between India and U.S.
Sunday, February 8, 2009 Hike in the Bangalore Wilderness
Our family met up at Kirsty and Andrew's in Koramangala, then Jessica, David, and Rupert, along with their six month old yellow labrador retriever, Bilby, plus Sarah and her daughter Sophea, took off for a "walkabout" past Sarjapur Road. We got off the main road and drove down a dirt road for a while then parked. There was a clearly marked trail which took us over railroad tracks, which of course all the kids love. Soon we entered a eucalyptus tree plantation, which, if you looked at it the right way, you couldn't tell it was planned and measured rows of trees.
Out into a clearing we came, to see a large pond not too far in the distance. Just about the time we were having a discussion about labs being rescued, and not knowing for sure if they were "pedigree", Bilby took a flying leap into the pond. The pedigree question became clear, and he was sure in doggy heaven. It was his first water experience.
Maya, Angus, Molly, Chloe, Charlie, Nico, and Rupert had a wonderful time running around the pond, until Chloe gave out a cry of alarm. She'd slipped in the mud and was covered up to her knees. Once Bilby saw her in distress he figured that was an opportune time to try to snatch the apple muffin she was eating. Rupert, Angus, and Nico proceeded to lose their sneakers in the mud, and it reminded me of walking out to the clam flats in York, Maine with my sister Mary and her boys, and them losing their flip flops in the mud. Ah, a rite of passage for all children.
After the walk we went our separate ways. Stopped at home for dosa lunch, then went over to the Park Hotel pool for a dip. Very refreshing after a hot walk. Kids had their standard sweet lime soda and hot chocolate ("you're sure you don't want cold chocolate?" asked the waiter, but Molly prefers hot, no matter what the weather). The three kids proceeded to put four sugar packets in each of their drinks, emptying the sugar bowl of packets.
Tues., Feb. 10 Book Club Still Going Strong
I'm enjoying my first book club ever. We started a couple years ago with Priya (US), Kirsty (Australia), Kate (UK), Jolene (Holland), Jessica (Sweden), and me. Jessica decided it wasn't her cup of tea, so dropped out. Alice (UK) then joined, and Kate and Jolene left India. Marylouise (US) and Kitty (India) have joined.
Tonight's book was Three Cups of Tea by Greg Mortenson. Fantastic book about Greg, who attempts to climb K2 (in Pakistan, it's the second highest mountain on earth; Mt. Everest is first). As he descends, exhausted and injured, he loses his way and stumbles into a small village. The villagers nurse him back to health. He asks how he can repay them and they ask him to build a school. This is the story of he goes about doing just that despite the area being torn apart by Taliban militants and tribal violence.
His NGO, Central Asia Institute, has built over 78 schools in Pakistan and Afghanistan as a way to promote peace in the world. This year he'll be awarded the highest civilian award by the Pakistani government for his humanitarian efforts. In book club, we talked about it being an uplifting as well as depressing story: uplifting for obvious reasons, and depressing--it made some of us ask ourselves: how can I live with myself? this guy has contributed so much to the world, and what have I done? Basically, others in the group talked the depressed of us down off the cliff. Just try to make a difference in the world, even if it's small scale, with your children and those around you.
Friday, Feb. 13 Movie night "Marley and Me"
Asked a few of my dog loving friends over for movie night. Brinda, Irfana, Divya, and Deepti. What
Wed., Feb. 18
Badri had a feeling yesterday--that what Molly had might be chicken pox. I must have been in denial, because it's such a big weekend coming up for her. I dropped Charlie off at school this morning and the director, Amba, asked where Molly was. When I told her she had a bad headache and fever yesterday, she said it's probably chicken pox. She also had, what we thought, were a few mosquito bites on her back and stomach, so we put her mosquito net on (which we hadn't done in quite some time).
So I sms'd Dr. Chinnappa and asked when I could bring her to Manipal so he could look at her. Molly has rehearsal ever afternoon this week for her dance performance Sunday night, and she has Annual Day at Neev on Friday and Saturday morning. She'll be crushed! She's so excited about everything she's been practicing for. I'm crushed, too.
Today I brought Charlie to the dentist for the first time, Rafael Parambi. His teeth are in fine shape. He just needs to do better on brushing. Has one spot that might turn into a cavity. Dentist also told him that he should let his mom and dad brush his teeth every once in a while (which has been a bone of contention for quite a while).
Maya had been saying that her top front teeth hurt a bit, so I brought her in, too. Basically, he says it's likely she'll need braces in a few years, that her top teeth jut out a bit. It's not something I would have noticed, but then I'm not the professional. Parambi is definitely not alarmist, and seems to believe that less is more, which I generally like in a dentist.
Thursday, Feb. 19, 2009
Taking care of health business all over the place. I went for my annual appointment with Dr. Vidya Desai Mohan, who I've been recommending to lots of friends. Veronique had her baby Jasmine delivered by her six months ago, and had a very positive experience then, and when she brought her driver's wife in last year, also. Dr. Vidya really takes the time to sit down and talk to you. Hence, one generally waits in the waiting room for about an hour for an appointment.
She was recommended to me by our former landlady, Parveen, and also by my former yoga classmate, Rani. Locals and expats alike go to see her. While I was waiting today, she and Parveen (first time I'd seen her in a sari) walked in to a full waiting room. Was pretty funny, actually. Dr. Vidya gave her a brief tour of the office and I had a little chat with Parveen before the doc starting seeing her patients.
Academic Exam Time Fever!
It's coming close to exam time here in Bangalore, and all parents and children from six years up are stressing out. Dr. Vidya has reduced her office time to 1 1/2 to 2 days a week so she can be at home to support her son, about 15 years old, while he studies. I hear the same story from local friends--who are exhausted and tell me it's because they were up til 2 or 3 in the morning giving moral support to their kids while they study. More often than not, the parents aren't sitting down with the to go over the material, but are just a supportive presence, cooking the comfort foods the kids love to keep them going during crunch time.
One of the reasons we've focused on Valley School and Mallya Aditi International School is because they're some of the only schools who don't formally test the students until they're in about sixth standard. I recently learned that, although tuitions are illegal, there are few families who don't do them. Tuitions are basically tutoring classes for children in whichever subject they need. I know kids as young as 7 years old who are in Hindi tuitions. Unbelievable!
Friday, February 20, 2009 Neev Jatre--Molly and Charlie's Last Pre-School Hurrah
Today we went to our two youngest in their final Neev performance. In India, the academic year's culminating show follows months of rehearsal. The kids live, eat, and breathe the lines and motions they'll go through on the big day. Molly and Charlie have been singing non-stop the numbers they'll be performing. Some parents consider it over-the-top and think that the kids would be better served to have a lot of running around time having fun and learning through fun activities at this young age (3-6 y.o.). Others see it as a great opportunity for the youngsters to build self-confidence and feel secure performing on a stage in front of a crowd.
For me, after seeing Molly in action today, I would say it's a good thing. From a three year old who, granted, was only going to Neev 2 1/2 hours a day, she's grown from a loner playing in the sand box, interacting little with her peers to a happy, outgoing six year old with a handful of lovely friends. When she started at Neev, Miss Amba--now the school administrator, but then a pre-school teacher--was the only one who had Molly figured out. While other teachers would throw their hands up in exasperation, Miss Amba took the time to sit down and talk to Molly and see her through her frustrating times. Badri and I talk about the fact that, if it hadn't been for Miss Amba, Molly may have been expelled from pre-school.
Now I'm not saying there aren't still tough times with Molly. She will still only read with me when she darn well feels like it. But--and this really shocked me--when I tell her it's time to do her homework, nine times out of ten she runs to the kitchen table and dives right in. It might only be six math problems and ten spelling words two or three times a week, but her enthusiasm certainly wasn't something I'd expected!
Her two performances today were a yoga demonstration and a Rang de Basanti dance. For yoga, she and her five classmates were dressed in white kurta pyjama (I'll include photos) with a tika (standard part of a Hindu woman's costume) painted on her forehead. Molly and her close friend Khushi were the two yoginis in the middle. For the readers, imagine Molly moving slowly and deliberately--almost trancelike--to the soothing voice of the unseen instructor, accompanied by serene music, performing the various asanas (yoga movements). She looked very serious, and one friend described it as "yoga with an attitude".
In Rang de Basanti, she danced with her little cabal of friends: Khushi, Iccha, Diya, Nithya, Aanyaa, Alyna, Ayana (yes--three different girls with startingly similar names), and Jemila (Australian) to a brilliant Bollywood tune. Four of them, including Molly, had on the same Fabindia salwar kameez, with their colorful dupattas (scarves) swinging about. It was a real tour de force and grand finale for the K2 (kindergarten 2) children, six of whom had gone through all four years together at Neev: toddler, pre-K, K1, and K2. It's sad to think that Molly won't be in school with them come June, the start of the next academic year.
On that note, received a call today from Aditi, Maya's school (where Charlie already has admission for June), asking Molly to go for an assessment next week. If that doesn't go well, she'll go to Valley School, where her friend Nithya will go. But if she does well, I don't think any of her Neev classmates will be in her school. Iccha, Diya, Aanyaa, and Alyna will all go to Vidya Shilp together, very close to Aditi. So they will manage to stay in touch.
Back to the Neev Jatre (jatre is loosely defined as "performance"). Charlie played the driver in a song about cars "Motor Chelli Pam Pam Pam", then a drummer in a group of students who came parading through the audience at the beginning of the show. He was most excited about the grand finale, when the whole school sang the new Neev school anthem, "I'm a Shooting Star", with all the gestures.
Saturday, February 21, 2009
In an effort to soak up more local culture, I brought Molly and Maya to the local music center, the Indiranagar Sangeetha Sabha. There was a group playing classical Carnatic music, which is mainly sung in the southern states of India (Andhra Pradesh, Tamil Nadu, Karnataka, and Kerala). The main emphasis in Carnatic music is on vocal music--most compositions are written to be sung, accompanied by instruments like a violin, a rhythm accompaniment, and a tambura. The most outstanding performances, and the greatest concentration of Carnatic musicians, are found in Chennai. I think that's one of the reasons Amma and Appa moved back to Chennai after living in Delhi for so many years. Amma is a classical Carnatic singer and they enjoy attending a lot of the performances. Kamala Chitti and Dorai Chittapa (living in the U.S. for the last 40+ years) still come back in December for the six-week long music season in Chennai. Some claim it's the world's largest cultural event!
Badri came in later with Charlie, who decided he didn't want to miss out. The audience was an older crowd, and we sat in the back in case we needed to make a quick getaway. The kids held out for about 45 minutes--which I didn't think was bad--then we left.
Sunday, February 22, 2009 Dueling Yogis
A couple days ago my old yoga teacher called to invite me to his school because Swami from the vinyasa school (vinyasa is breath synchronized movement) was visiting. I had no idea who this person was, but wanted to go and see Acharya, my teacher, because it had been over a year since I'd stopped practicing there and hadn't seen him since.
same chant as Art of Living. inhale/exhale, raise and lower hands, rotate body, neck rolls. slow, medium, rapid and fast. Lay down and attain moksha. go sit on the moon or play among the stars.
A yogi from Andra Pradesh was also there. When it appeared as if no one had journeyed into the cosmos, he suggested he try his method. Swami said he'd shortened his session because he knew we were running behind already and some people had to leave. He also pointed out that the cd player a student had run out to his home and brought wasn't working properly, and went on to say that if h'd been able to play that music with violins, we were certainly attained moksha.
Our yoga teacher's daughter was at the visit. She said she was confused between Christianity and Hinduism (her mother is Christian and her father is Hindu).. She asked the yogi if one must be religious in order to be spiritual. Yogi replied that he's not at all religious. You just have to be a good person, he said.
Molly's swinger's performance. St. John's Auditorium
Feb. 23
Maya holiday
Academy awards at Priya's
Feb. 24
Janaki auntie chemo. Every 4 wks for 3 mos
to acharya yoga with Praveena, vandana's mom,
ML here for visit
Feb. 25
ran into Matitya from Nigeria, w mom 4 kid. 1st, 6th, 4th grade and JK
lunch at Bombay club with Badri
Feb. 26
lunch with Kendra here
Kavi, Aanyaa and Pragya here for playdate
Feb. 27
playdate here with angus and all
Feb. 28
both have had
